Monday, January 16, 2012

Smoking Again - Part II

I just thought I'd write a little something about how I'm feeling about this.

I've noticed that I'm drinking a hell of a lot more water and yet my lips are still cracked. Time for a little chapstick.

Also, I'm noticing the stink a hell of a lot more. In my depressed state, I didn't really think the stink would bother me at all. I'll write a bit more on that at some stage if I can figure out how to write about it... Of course, this doesn't at all help with my self esteem.

As for my energy levels, I'm not really noticing a difference. I'm walking a lot at the moment (using exercise as an excuse but also trying my best not to have to borrow any money thus trying to spend less - I've now officially got "sod all" in my account in which case, I think I've failed on that aim). The main hassle with this is the fact that I'm feeling almost constantly dehydrated despite how much I'm drinking.

A couple of kids saw me the other day and said to me "you smell like smoke". What do you say? "Don't try this at home kids"? Really... don't try it. It's freakin' awful and once you start you form habits around it and those habits become integral to how you operate making quitting troublesome...

You don't have to stink and suffer from a dry mouth/cracked lips. Because really.... what else does smoking do for me? That sounds like something straight out of Allen Carr's books...

About those books: Some really good points but a horribly repetitive read. I'd say follow the instructions until you're really just feeling that's enough of this bollocks and jump to the last chapter. Otherwise, if you're anything like me, you'll get distracted by the fact that the book has become really incredibly boring.

Oh and no - I didn't read them for this attempt. I read it a few years ago. I had quit for a few months. I don't think I was ready. I think I am now but really do desperately need to find some way of taking breaks where I'm thinking about the code or the next step or how to get around a particular problem.

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