Saturday, October 22, 2011

One More Month

There's only one more month. Just one more...

Back in June I did this one paragraph in a post which had taken me ages to get right - down to a paragraph and not so whingy. It was a subject that I could have ranted and raved about at great length and had me horribly upset. Anyway, I'm finding myself saying "just one more month".

The problem is, all of this is just leading up to exactly the same mistakes being made.

At Ulearn I was surprised when I was being flirted with. It happened several times. Being surprised... not so great (I really do need to figure out that whole self-esteem thing). However, given how I have been feeling of late (essentially homeless), a bit of an ego boost.

But is it really? My ego hasn't really been feeling that much more validated. Is this "one more month" stopping me from enjoying the flirting? And for what? A thunderous lack of communication?

Define frustrated.

Thinking on - I seem to be spending my life waiting. Waiting for the new job to kick in so that I can afford to change the "homeless" situation. Waiting to resolve a simple "maybe" - and that's just to see if someone wants to hang out (I really hate the word "maybe"). Waiting to see what happens. Waiting, waiting, waiting...

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